GHOUL POOL 2007

 

Rules and FAQs

 

contact: j (underscore) grim (underscore) shaw (underscore) 55 (at) yahoo.com. Sorry for the lack of a hyperlink, but I hate spambots.

THE CURRENT STANDINGS

Names in bold face are on multiple lists. For easy reference, the entrant numbers of those lists will be found after the name (in parenthesis, and in a purple font).

Names of the * cough * deceased will appear in a bold red font.

 

 

USHER OF THE CRYPT

entrant 1

126 points

Saluting Our (so far) Surviving WWI Veterans

1. Frank Buckles (21 points)
2. Emiliano Mercado del Toro (21 points)
3. Howard Ramsey (21 points)
4. Antonio Pierro (21 points)

And:
5. Julie Winnefred Bertrand (21 points)
6. Emma Tilman (21 points)
7. Ruby Muhammed (1, 12, 15) (7 points)
8. Rep. Charles Norwood (21 points)
9. Albert Hofmann (1, 15) (10.5 points)
10. Louis Farrakhan (21 points)

Under 30

Jack Osbourne

 

THE MOMINATOR

entrant 2

73.5 points

1. Bob BARKER. (2, 19) Satan bids a buck & a "C’moooon Down." It’s the RIGHT time. (10.5 points)

2. Anna Nicole SMITH. (21 points)

3. Larry KING. Live ... oops. Next caller: The Grim Reaper. Sufferin’ suspenders Lar – you’re "outa time." (Details on Anderson Cooper’s 360) (21 points)

4. Suzanne SOMERS. Product-pimp pin-up – oughta sell ONE more thing. (Master THIS) Stealin’ time. (21 points)

5. Tammy Faye BAKKER (Messner). (10.5 points) (2, 3)

6. Rec. (Rhetoric) Jesse JACKSON. The final shakedown. A fraud & a faker / he gwanna meet his maker (Can’t make no mo’ rhyme ‘cause, he got no mo’ time) AMEN. (21 points)

7. Barbara BUSH. 59 years too late. On borrowed time. Please Allah. (21 points)

8. Jerry FALWELL. (21 points)

9. Kim Jong IL. One more ‘poster pose’ – 4 a head stone. Please god. (21 points)

10. Deborah KERR. (21 points)

UNDER 30

Bindy Irwin (Croc. Hunter’s Spawn) Crikey – gets too close – that’s WHY they’re called "Animals ..." duh. (21 points)

 

I SHOT TECUMSEH

entrant 3

31.5 points


1. gloria stuart (3, 15) (10.5 points)
2. robert byrd (3, 5) (10.5 points)
3. karl malden (21 points)
4. joan fontaine (21 points)
5. hugh carey (3, 16) (10.5 points)
6. maximilian schell (21 points)
7. eli wallach (3, 9) (10.5 points)
8. tammy faye (10.5 points) (2, 3)
9. yitzhak shamir (21 points)
10. george smathers (21 points)


under 30 - brad renfro. (21 points)

JUDGE CRATER

entrant 4

42 points

1. Composer Elliott Carter Jr. Composer of classical music. I'm sure he'll go out classy. (21 points)


2. Lena Horne. Stormy Weather indeed. (21 points)


3. Sonny von Bulow. Enough already! (21 points)


4. Mitch Miller. FOLL-ow THE Boun-CING HEART mon..i ..t..orrrrrrrrrr... (21 points)


5. Nelson Mandela. That jail time has got to have taken a toll. (21 points)

6. Gian Carlo Menotti. Sotto voce? (21 points)

7. Vintner Robert Mondavi. No whine ... it's time. (21 points)

8. Meinhardt Raab. Mayor of Munchkinville impeached? (21 points)

9. David Rockefeller. Richer than God, but the Big Guy still calls the shots. (21 points)

10. Secret Santa Claus Larry Stewart. Tell all the kids you know that Santa died. (21 points)


River Phoenix Memorial Category:


Mario Etheridge, Detroit bouncer who killed rapper Proof. (21 points)

 

JUGGERNAUT BOY

entrant 5

31.5 points

1. Kitty Carlisle. Is that your final answer? (5, 19) (10.5 points)
2. Barbara Hale. Perry needs me!!! (21 points)
3. Toni Morrison. PleasePleasePlease (21 points)
4. Robert Byrd. Still can't believe he choked on a PORK BONE (3, 5) (10.5 points)
5. Everett Koop. Latex Poisoning ??? (5, 11) (10.5 points)
6. Bill Walsh. Where's my play book? (21 points)
7. Jim McKay. The agony of death. (21 points)
8. Daniel Schorr. It's a conspiracy!!! (21 points)
9. Sammy Baugh. Gone out for a long one. (21 points)
10. Maya Angelou. I Know Why The Fat Lady Sings (21 points)

Under 30

David Banda. I should have stayed home!!!!! (21 points)

MY BROTHER'S REAPER

entrant 6

42 points

 

1. Jon Bauman - aka"Bowzer"- ShaNaNa no more (21 points)

2. Monte Hall - chose the wrong door (21 points)

3. Don Ho. All his tiny bubbles popped. (21 points)

4. the DONALD - protruding lips, 'hot comb' and/or wig got out-trumped (21 points)

5. Evel Knievel - final jump into eternity. (21 points)

6. Dr.Joyce Brothers - used up her $64K (21 points)

7. Dame Judi Dench - 'her time went by' (21 points)

8. Rachel Zoe - maybe she can doll-up the reaper (21 points)

9. Jean Harris - her time to reunite with the diet doctor (21 points)

10. Greg Page - the yellow shirted wiggler can't wiggle out of this one (21 points)

Under 30

Frank Agnello - son of Victoria Gotti (21 points)

 

SUDDENLY, LAST GHOUL


entrant 7

31.5 POINTS

1. Elizabeth Taylor (7, 19) (10.5 points)
2. Larry Hagman (21 points)
3. Regis Philbin (21 points)
4. Joey Bishop (10.5 points) (7, 21) (10.5 points)
5. Beverly Cleary (21 points)
6. Kirk Douglas (7, 13, 15. 19) (5.25 points)
7. Peter Green (21 points)
8. Richard Attenborough (7, 10) (10.5 points)
9. Art Buchwald (21 points)
10. John Forsythe (21 points)

Under thirty: Mary Kate Olsen (7, 18) (10.5 points)

 

DOUBLE "D" (Date with Death)

entrant 8

1. Boy George - because (21 points)

2. Xzibit - because all rappers need to... "...never wait around, for kick down" (21 points)

3. Peter Graves - just because they really ought to... (21 points)

and

4. Vern Troyer - to spare us their dreadful commercials (21 points)

5. Dan Gottlieb - no more "Voices" (21 points)

6. the Rev.Al Sharpton—he needs to join his 'soul bro' James Brown,soon---real soon (21 points)

7. Ed Koch -now he's asking St.Pete:"How my do'n?" (21 points)

8. Bill Parcells -the BIG TUNA gets harpooned (21 points)

9. Bill Cosby -needs to (21 points)

10. O.J.Simpson -he REALLY needs to (21 points)

Under 30

FreekeyZekey (Ezekiel Jiles). A 'drive-by' will be quick and painless---unlike his 'music?' ! (21 points)

 

Mrs. Estes Kefauver

entrant 9

1. John Wooden - Winningest College Coach - Ya can't win 'em all (21 points)
2. Mark Felt - Deep Throat, 6 Feet Deep (21 points)
3. Roberta McCain - Sen. McCain's mother - 'nuff said (21 points)
4. Jack Kevorkian - Doctor Death indeed (9, 11) (10.5 points)
5. Sherwood Schwartz - No longer here on Gilligan's Isle (21 points)
6. Van Johnson - Go home to Bonnie Jean - "Brigadoon" (21 points)
7. Eli Wallach - starred in "A Lovely Way to Die" (3, 9) (10.5 points)
8. Harold Pinter - wrote "Ashes to Ashes" (21 points)
9. Andrew Wyeth - Bye bye Helga (21 points)
10. Willard Wirtz - Sec. of Labor 1962-69 (21 points)

under 30 Pick

Lindsay Lohan (9, 17) (10.5 points)


Who Shot Tecumseh?

(entrant 10)

21 points



1. Jules Dassin (21 points)
2. Alan Greenspan (21 points)
3. Michelangelo Antonioni (21 points)
4. Richard Attenborough (7, 10) (10.5 points)
5. Hutton Gibson (21 points)
6. Eunice Kennedy Shriver (21 points)
7. Sidney Lumet (21 points)
8. Kevin McCarthy ... will his body be snatched this year? (10, 13) (10.5 points)
9. Roberta Clift (21 points)
10. Walter Cronkite (10, 13) (10.5 points)

Under Thirty

Hillary Duff (10, 21) (10.5 points)

Dee Snider

entrant 11

  1. Ray Bradbury (21 points)
  2. Jesse Helms (21 points)
  3. Earl Scruggs (21 points)
  4. Charlton Heston (21 points)
  5. Don Van Vliet (21 points)
  6. Fats Domino (21 points)
  7. Zsa Zsa Gabor (11, 21) (10.5 points)
  8. Jack Kevorkian (9, 11) (10.5 points)
  9. Muhammed Ali (21 points)
  10. C. Everett Koop (5, 11) (10.5 points)

Under 30:
Pete Doherty (11, 15) (10.5 points)

Die Todesmacher

entrant 12

42 points

  1. Ruby Muhammad ("Mother of the Nation of Islam") (1, 12, 15) (7 points)
  2. Luise Rainer (21 points)
  3. Sun Myung Moon (21 points)
  4. Richard Widmark (21 points)
  5. Phyllis A. Whitney (21 points)
  6. Bruce Bennet (AKA Herman Bix)(21 points)
  7. Mike Wallace (21 points)
  8. Studs Terkel (21 points)
  9. Madeleine L'Engle (21 points)
  10. Ricardo Montalban (21 points)


Under Thirty:

Katie Blair (Miss Teen USA 2006) (21 points)

 

Thor Thumb

entrant 13

  1. Kirk Douglas (7, 13, 15. 19) (5.25 points)
  2. Jean Simmons (21 points)
  3. Donald Rumsfeld (13, 14) (10.5 points)
  4. Andy Rooney (21 points)
  5. BB King (13, 16) (10.5 points)
  6. Chuck Berry (21 points)
  7. Walter Cronkite (10, 13) (10.5 points)
  8. Robert McNamara (21 points)
  9. Kevin McCarthy (10 , 13) (10.5 points)
  10. Danny Bonaduce (21 points)

Under 30 pick (until August)

Edward Furlong (21 points)

 

The Old War Whores

entrant 14

  1. George Bush (Sr.) (21 points)
  2. George W. Bush (21 points)
  3. Dick Cheney (21 points)
  4. Donald Rumsfeld (13, 14) (10.5 points)
  5. John Ashcroft (21 points)
  6. Alberto Gonzales (21 points)
  7. Karl Rove (21 points)
  8. Ariel Sharon (14, 15, 17, 18) (5.25 points)
  9. Benjamin Netinyahu (21 points)
  10. Walden O'Dell (21 points)

Under Thirty

Paris Hilton (21 points)

FELLOWSHIP OF FATALITY

entrant 15

52.5 POINTS

  1. Fidel Castro (15, 18, 19, 21) (5.25 points)
  2. Ruby Muhammad (1, 12, 15) (7 points)
  3. Ariel Sharon (14, 15, 17, 18) (5.25 points)
  4. Gloria Stuart (3, 15) (10.5 points)
  5. Brooke Astor (21 points)
  6. Charles Lane (15, 17) (10.5 points)
  7. Albert Hofmann (1, 15) (10.5 points)
  8. Oscar Niemeyer (21 points)
  9. Kirk Douglas (7, 13, 15. 19) (5.25 points)
  10. Ernest Gallo (21 points)

UNDER 30

Pete Doherty (11, 15)

Entrant 16

entrant 16

42 POINTS

  1. Hugh Carey (3, 16) (10.5 points)
  2. Russell Baker (21 points)
  3. John Mortimer (21 points)
  4. Kurt Vonnegut (21 points)
  5. George Jones (21 points)
  6. Norman Mailer (21 points)
  7. Joyce Randolph (21 points)
  8. B.B. King (13, 16) (10.5 points)
  9. Jerry Lee Lewis (21 points)
  10. Carl Erskine (21 points)

UNDER 30

(waived)

Jeebus Buddhallah

(entrant 17)

21 POINTS

  1. Ariel Sharon (14, 15, 17, 18)(he has 2 girl names, how did he live so long?). (5.25 points)
  2. Dick Clark (will the world end if the undead is not here to usher in the new year?) . (21 points)
  3. Margaret Thatcher (rust defeats the Iron Lady, rust in peace). (21 points)
  4. Haji Mohammad Suharto (chooses death to, yet again, avoid genocide prosecution). (21 points)
  5. Betty Ford (17, 18)(part of the Ford Corporation's reorganization plan: a few models must be phased out. While the "Betty" was ahead of her time, running on alcohol and other alternative fuels, she just didn't handle well). (10.5 points)
  6. Lady Bird Johnson (17, 18)(avian flu's 1st North American victim?). (10.5 points)
  7. Mother Angelica (it's about time this dessicated, old habit mannequin fed the worms). (21 points)
  8. Mr. Blackwell (Worst Dressed for 2007: 1. Jesus, 2. Mohamed (pbuh), 3. Moses, etc, etc...) (21 points)
  9. Billy Graham (go home to Jesus already!). (21 points)
  10. Charles Lane (15, 17)(time to move from the slow lane into the exit lane). (10.5 points)

 

Under Thirty

Lindsay Lohan (9, 17) (I have a feeling her father will do her in before her eating disorders and substance abuse have a chance to do the job). (10.5 points)

 

 

THE LOO RAWLS

entrant 18

10.5 POINTS

  1. Dr. Mahathir Mohamad (Malaysia) (21 points)
  2. Fidel Castro (15, 18, 19, 21) (5.25 points)
  3. Bhumibol Adulyadej (King of Thailand) (21 points)
  4. Jerry Lewis (21 points)
  5. Osama Bin Ladin (21 points)
  6. Ron Santo (21 points)
  7. Ian Smith (Rhodesia) (21 points)
  8. Ariel Sharon (14, 15, 17, 18) (5.25 points)
  9. Betty Ford (17, 18) (10.5 points)
  10. Lady Bird Johnson (17, 18) (10.5 points)

Under 30:

Mary Kate Olsen (7, 18) (10.5 points)

HATES GUMBI

entrant 19

31.5 points


1. Fidel Castro (15, 18, 19, 21) (5.25 points)
2. Ingmar Bergman (21 points)
3. Henry Kissinger (21 points)
4. Elizabeth Taylor (7, 19) (10.5 points)
5. Kirk Douglas (7, 13, 15. 19) (5.25 points)
6. Bob Barker (2, 19) (10.5 points)
7. Kitty Carlisle. (5, 19) (10.5 points)
8. Eddie Arnold (21 points)
9. Mickey Rooney (21 points)
10.Doris Day (21 points)

Under 30:
Justin Timberlake (21 points)

CARDINAL FANG

21 points

entrant 20

1. Arthur C. Clarke (21 points)

2. Ernest Borgnine (21 points)

3. Delbert Mann (21 points)

4. Jacques Barzun (21 points)

5. Harold Bloom (21 points)

6. Helen Thomas (21 points)

7. Fred Pohl (21 points)

8. B.K.S. Iyengar (21 points)

9. Alexander Solzhenitsyn (21 points)

10. Jack Chick (21 points)

UNDER THIRTY

Christina Aguilera (21 points)

 

ShockAndAwe

entrant 21

10.5 points

  1. Joey Bishop (7, 21) (10.5 points)
  2. Zsa Zsa Gabor (11, 21) (10.5 points)
  3. Fidel Castro (15, 18, 19, 21) (5.25 points)
  4. Annette Funicello (21 points)
  5. Claude Levi Strauss (21 points)
  6. Abigail Van Buren (21 points)
  7. Farrah Fawcett (21 points)
  8. Oral Roberts (21 points)
  9. Soupy Sales (21 points)
  10. Paul Harvey (21 points)


Under 30

Hillary Duff (10, 21) (10.5 points)

 

 

 

 

THE CURRENT STANDINGS

FIRST PLACE: 126 points

The Usher of Death (entrant 1)

SECOND PLACE: 73.5 points:

The Mominator (entrant 2)

THIRD PLACE: 52.5 points:

The Fellowship of Fatality (entrant 15)