GHOUL POOL 2009
Names in bold face
are on multiple lists. For easy reference, the entrant numbers of those lists
will be found after the name (in parenthesis, and in a purple font).
Names of the * cough *
deceased will appear in a bold red font.
Contact: j_grim_shaw_55@yahoo.com
Ghoul
Pool 2008 Final Standings
Ghoul
Pool 2007 Final Standings
Entrant 1
Amy winehouse 2014
10.5 POINTS
1. Michael Jackson (1, 5)
10.5
2. Elizabeth
Taylor (1, 8, 12, 17, 18)
3. Scott Weiland
4. Cloris
Leachman (1, 8)
5. Abe Vigoda
6. Gary Coleman
7. Chris Leben (an “Ultimate Fighter”)
8. Dick
Cheney (1, 19)
9. Bernie Madoff
10. Britney
Spears (1, 19)
River
Mary-Kate Olsen
Entrant 2
JUDGE CRATER
1. Composer Elliott Carter Jr. -- won
Pulitizer for music in 1833.
2.
3. Susan Atkins—Manson moll has had it with prison (2, 5) 10.5 points
4. Somali President Abdullahi Yusuf
Ahmed -- either really sick or not.
5. Mary Travers—she’s leavin’, but not on a jet
plane. 21 points
6. Nelson Mandela
7. Colm Feore -- actor gets casting call
from God
8. Mayor of Munchkinville Meinhardt Raab
9. David Rockefeller -- 86 Rock
10. Eluana Eglaro—
River
Kirsten Dunst.
Entrant 3
MRS. ESTES KEFAUVER
63 POINTS
1. Steve Jobs—system failure
2. Robert Novak—being in bed with Cheney rubbed off
on his karma (3, 5) 10.5 points
3. Mitch Miller - Wilted Rose of
4. Corazon Aquino—it’s her colon, not her corazon 21 points
5. Sherwood Schwartz - No longer "Here
on Gilligan's Isle"
6. Ted Kennedy—“Carry on, Caroline” (3, 10, 18) 7 points
7. Eli Wallach - starred in "
8. Patrick Swayze—he survived the worst
movie of the 80’s, “Red Dawn,” but he can’t shake the cancer (3, 5, 12, 13, 17, 19) 3.5 points
9. Andrew Wyeth - Bye bye Helga
10. Willard
Wirtz - Sec. of Labor 1962-69 (3, 16)
River
Li’l
Entrant 4
you Can’t Eat Bojangles!
42 POINTS
1. bulbous-nosed
karl
2. old lady from titanic
gloria stuart (4, 13)
3. senile former isreali
prime minister yitzhak shamir
4. nixon’s 4th
attorney general william b. saxbe
5. olivia’s evil sister
joan fontaine
6. michael bloomberg’s
mom charlotte bloomberg
7. subject of maria
shriver’s book ‘what’s happening to grandpa?’ sargent shriver
8. over-emoting oscar
winner jennifer
jones. 21 points
9. mediocre author
10. geriatric hurler
bob feller
River
ryan’s drug-addled son
Entrant 5
THE ROASTER
35 POINTS
1. Susan Atkins (Farewell, Manson sidekick, bye bye
now) (2, 5) 10.5 points
2. George
Steinbrenner (The Boss goes to the final playoff) (5,
18)
3. Patrick Swayze (now
somebody can finally put baby in a corner) (3, 5,
12, 13, 17, 19) 3.5 points
4. Michael Jackson (fatal facial cave-in) (1, 5) 10.5 points
5. Bob Novak (a generation of ultra conservatives
falls one by one) (2, 5) 10.5 points
6. Jeff Conaway (please oh please)
7. Mickey
Rooney (most memorable for that horrifying spectacle in Breakfast at
Tiffany’s) (5, 17)
8. Oscar
Niemeyer (architect, did not invent a wiener) (5,
13)
9. Severiano
Ballestros (on the final green of life) (5, 16)
10. John Demjanjuk (finally, it’s his turn
at the death camp)
River
Amy
Winehouse (didn’t go to rehab, no, no, no) (5,
12)
Entrant 6
“the usher of the crypt”
First,
some of Nixon’s secretaries—nuff said:
1. James D. Hodgson (Labor)
2.
Walter Joseph Hickel (Interior).
3.
Clifford Morris Hardin (Agriculture).
Some
Favorities from Last Year:
4.
Ace Parker, NFL Hall-of-Famer.
5. Billy Werber,
Babe Ruth’s teammate. 21 points
6.
Olivia de Havilland, maybe she’ll be gone with the wind this year.
7.
Art Linkletter, plans to attend his last “House
Party” in ’09.
And
a Couple New Names:
8. Richard Todd
(the actor, not the footballer), only star of “The Longest Day” who also
participated in the real-life event. 21 points
9. Hon. William H. Avery, Governor of Kansas who cold
bloodedly sanctioned the “offings” of Perry Smith and Richard Hickock.
Capote is still grateful. 21 points
10. Sen. Clifford
Hansen. Older
than the hills of
River
Jack Osbourne (I’m stickin’ with you, kid)
Entrant 7
Malice aforethought
1. Boy George—because
2. Peter Graves - just because he really
ought to
3. Roman Polanski - does he think he will
finally get all those
virgins in the hereafter? And does he think he will be able to
re-enter the
4. Dan Gottlieb - no more
"Voices"
5. Dr. Robert Jarvik - that'll teach him
not to copy someone else's invention and claim it for his own!
6. the Rev.Al Sharpton-croak
SOON - real soon, please
7. Ed Koch - still gonna ask St.
Pete:"How my do'n?"
8. Bill Parcells - the BIG TUNA gets
harpooned
9. Bill Cosby - he still needs to
10.O.J.Simpson -
Yes, he REALLY needs to croak
River
rapper
Carl Dobson, aka Crazy Titch
Entrant 8
My Brother’s Reaper
1. Jon Bauman-aka"Bowzer"-ShaNaNa
no more
2.
3. The DONALD- protruding lips, 'hot comb'
and/or wig got out-trumped
4. Dr. Joyce Brother- used up her $64K
5. Dame Judi Dench- her time 'went by'
6. Liz
Taylor- death, not diamonds, is forever (1, 8,
12, 17, 18)
7. Jean Harris- her time is now to reunite
w/ the diet doctor
8. Pernell Roberts - good cowboy who always
wore black
9. Cloris
Leachman- since Mary ain't going yet, may as well
be this broad (1, 8)
10.Don Rickles------need
I say more (8, 21)
River
Frank Agnello- son of Victoria Gotti
Entrant 9
Jim Hely
1. Doris Lessing
2. PD James
3. Nadine Gordimer
4.
5. Russell Baker
6. Helen Thomas
7.
8. Gore Vidal
9. Yogi Berra
10. Merle Haggard
RIVER
waived
Entrant 10
Juggernauto 2009
7 points
1. John Paul Stevens… finally the last
isiotic decision is on its way.
2. Barbara Hale. Perry needs me Be Patient
3. Toni Morrison. PleasePleasePlease
4. Robert
Byrd. Still can't believe he choked on a PORK BONE (10, 21)
5.
6. Daniel Schorr. It's a conspiracy; I Think..!!!
7. Maya Angelou. I Know Why The Fat Lady Sings
8.Louis
Farrakhan: It's Been Fun
9.Ted Kennedy:
Good Bye Gas Bag (3, 10, 18) 7 points
10.Billy
Graham....Yes Jesus Loves Me
River
David Banda. I should have stayed home,
chasing lions!!!!!
Entrant 11
The Mominator
21 points
1. Hugh Hefner: A whole new
meaning of "stiff" for this bunny-lovin' pablum sucker ... (11, 12)
2.
Sen Ted Stevens: Defeated,
disgraced and DEAD in '09.
3.
Jesse Jackson: His clout in
doubt, the extortionist cashes out.
Amen.
4.
June Havoc: Wrecked!
5.
Pat Robertson: The Majority of
Falwelll ... STILL waiting ...
6.
Larry King: "Live"
(NOT)
7.
John Madden: The most annoying
voice in pro sportscasting.
8.
Patricia Marie (a/k/a Patty) Andrews:
boogie-woogies to re-unit with sisters Laverne & Maxine for that big
trio in the sky.
9. Barbara Bush: Should've "raised ducks" instead of
schmucks. (11, 21)
10. John J. O'Connor,
III: Driven to dimentia by
his wife Sandy's complicity in W's theft of the White House? 21 points
River Phoenix Memorial Award:
Kim Kardashian: couldn't keep up.
Entrant 12
R.L. Basse
3.5 points
1. Hugh
Hefner (11, 12)
2. Barack Obama (Insensitive, but hey…)
3. James Lipton (Inside the Actors Studio)
4. Queen Elizabeth (of
5. Patrick Swayze (3, 5,
12, 13, 17, 19) 3.5 points
6. Kirk
7. Dick
Clark (12, 15)
8. Clint Eastwood
9. Elizabeth
Taylor (1, 8, 12, 17, 18)
10. Gary Busey
River
Amy
Winehouse (“…has developed emphysema due to smoking cigarettes and crack
cocaine…” (5, 12)
Entrant 13
The Fellowship of Fatality
14 points
1. Gloria
Stuart (4, 13)
2. Albert
Rosellini (13, 18)
3. John
Wooden (13, 16)
4. Zsa
Zsa Gabor (13, 19)
5. Oscar
Niemeyer (5, 13)
6. Claude Levi-Strauss (13,
15) 10.5
points
7. Miep Gies
8. Jacques Barzun
9. Betty Ford
10. Patrick Swayze (3, 5,
12, 13, 17, 19) 3.5 points
RIVER
Pete Doherty
Entrant 14
Borg9
21 POINTS
1.
2. C. Everett Koop (10,
14)
3. Eunice Shriver (21 points)
4.
Richard Attenborough
5.
Mike Wallace
6.
Andy Rooney
7.
Hutton Gibson
8.
Robert Morganthau
9.
John Astin
10. Morgana King
River
Blake Fielder Civil
Entrant 15
Die Todesmacher
31.5 POINTS
1. Ray Bradbury
2. Jayne Meadows
3. Artie Lange
4. Claude Levi Strauss (13,
15) 10.5
points
5. Dick
Clark (12, 15)
6. Joe Esterhasz
7. Maureen O’Hara
8. Les Paul (21 points)
9. Rose Marie
10. Efrem Zimbalist, Jr.
RIVER
Jodie Sweetin
Entrant 16
Jeeper Creeper
63 Points
1. John
Wooden (a ‘woody’ can’t last forever, can it?) (13,
16)
2. Seve
Ballesteros (Accepting an invite to join the "Eternal Tour") (5, 16)
3. Myles Brand (A "Final Four" of a different
kind) 21 points
4. Bob Sheppard (God needs a P.A.
announcer)
5. Tommy Henrich ("Old Reliable" comes
through again) 21
points
6. Herman Wouk (Has written his own
obituary...800 pages long)
7. Jack Lalanne (Crunch this, pal)
8. Dom DiMaggio (Goin' to find where Joe has gone) (21 points)
9. W.
Willard Wirtz (Come, put your "Labor" down) (3, 16)
10. Mitch
Miller (Sing Along with the Jeeper) (3, 16)
River
Adam "Pacman" Jones (Rich, careless and stoopid)
Entrant 17
Hates Gumbi
3.5 points
1. Gabriel Garcia Marquez
2. Peggy Fleming
3. Fidel Castro
4. Henry
Kissinger (17, 18)
5. Elizabeth
Taylor (1, 8, 12, 17, 18)
6. Bob Barker
7. Patrick Swayze (3, 5, 12, 13, 17, 19) 3.5 points
8. Mickey
Rooney (5, 17)
9. Doris Day
10. Kirk
River phoenix Memorial Award:
Justin Timberlake
Entrant 18
Morgue Mistress
7 points
1. Peter Falk
2. Teddy Kennedy (3, 10,
18) 7
points
3. George
Steinbrenner (5, 18)
4. Joe Paterno
5. Nancy Reagan
6. Woody Allen
7. Henry
Kissinger (17, 18)
8. Albert
Rossellini (oldest living former governor) (13,
18)
9. Jimmy Carter
10. Elizabeth
Taylor (1, 8, 12, 17, 18)
River
Amy
Winehouse (5, 10, 11, 17, 18)
Entrant 19
ShockNAwe
87.5 points
1. Ryan O’Neal
2. Zsa
Zsa Gabor (13, 19)
3.Dick
Cheney (1, 19)
4. Annette Funicello
5. Patrick Swayze (3, 5,
12, 13, 17, 19) 3.5 points
6. Abigail Van Buren
7. Farrah Fawcett.
21 points
8. Oral Roberts. 21 points
9. Soupy Sales. 21 points
10. Paul Harvey.
21 points
RIVER
Entrant 20
CARDINAL FANG
1. Deanna Durbin
2. Ernest Borgnine
3. Essie Mae Washington-Williams (Daughter
of Strom Thurmond—world’s oldest Love Child)
4. Louise Rainer
5. Harold Bloom
6. Tony Curtis
7. Fred Pohl
8. B.K.S. Iyengar
9. Walter Mondale
10. Jack Chick
River Phoneix Memorial Award:
Avril Lavigne
Entrant 21
Patrick Swayze will outlive us all
1. Peter O'Toole
2. John Glenn
3. Robert
Byrd (10, 31)
4. Les Stroud
5. J.D. Salinger
6. Margaret Thatcher
7. James Watson
8. Don
Rickles (8, 21)
9. Michael J. Fox
10. Barbara
Bush (11, 21)
River Phoneix Memorial Award:
Trig Palin (I am fully aware that if there
is a hell, I will burn there for all eternity)
SHOCKnAWE
(entrant 19)
SECOND PLACE: 84 points
THE USHER OF THE CRYPT
(entrant 6)
MRS. ESTES KEFAUVER (entrant 3)
and
JEEPER CREEPER (entrant 16)